London Bridges Falling Down

But, hopefully not when I'm there. I leave for London today and am very excited. I'm more than a little happy to be in a country where I can speak the language and know what I'm ordering at a restaurant. It's been hillarious here in Germany ordering at a restaurant and always being surprised at what they bring out. We'll only be there about 48 hours, sadly, but we are intending to use the time very efficiently. Saturday night we have tickets to see The Phantom of the Opera at Her Majesty's Theatre. That should be great! More info and pics to come.

Well, today marks the halfway point for my Germany stay. I've been here six weeks and have six more weeks to go, 3 more weeks of full-time teaching. I don't think I have had any time of my life go by as quickly as this time. I'm already not looking forward to saying goodbye to my students and host family. This week of school went well as we wrapped up Hamlet and spent two days in the library/lab getting ready for the Hamlet debates on Monday/Tuesday. I'm impressed with how much the students have gotten into this debate. Competition is a wonderful motivator. :) Here is a picture of my 7th period in the computer lab.

Thursday was chapel. I am continually blessed by the worship and unity I find during the weekly chapels. Most of the students in the worship band are my seniors and it's great to see them lead the rest of the high school. They do a great job! The sound on this video is poor due to my camera and does not represent the quality of the music live, but it's a clip of part of one of their songs. One can sense the presence of the Spirit in the room. As I watch the students singing, I know that the majority of their expressions of praise during worship are sincere and Spirit-led. Many of these students come from missionary families that regularly see the persecution of the Church and appreciate the freedom of religious expression. I wonder how much better they understand praising God and the power of God than I do?

Hamlet and Barry's Noodle Bake

Dear Friends,

It's been a while since an update. Things are busy as usual. This week went well; I'm getting more and more into the routine of teaching, yet still have a few "settling in" things to wrap up - my passport comes back tomorrow!

This week I had the opportunity to talk with one of my students who has demonstrated issues with authority (specifically, female) in class. He has a rough background: abandoned by his father at a young age, brother commited suicide a few years ago. We have a fun/bantering relationship in class, but I can tell, and am wary, that if I need to use my "teacher authority" on him, sparks will be sure to fly. Already, when I ask him to do something, he does it begrudgingly. Anyway, I talked to him after class one day, and asked him if he would tell me how he would like me to correct him. I told him that I knew he didn't like authority over him, and asked how he would take correction best. He seemed surprised and pleased that a teacher would ask him this. The conversation ended up taking about 30 minutes as we got off onto topics about doctrine, authoritative institutions and their purpose, and the origin of truth and morality. He asked some good, challenging questions, and I appreciated that he was a thinker and was observant enough to ask them. Yet, his thoughts evidence a faulty groundwork and perspective. More a result of ignorance and imaturity, I believe, than anything else. I think he'll have quite a worldview challenge and wake-up call when he goes to college. However, I was so glad for this connection and time with him. I had been wanting to find ways to connect spiritually with my students, specifically some of them - this young man being one. I look forward to more opportunities like this. These type of conversations are part of the reason that I teach.

This Saturday I took a day trip to Freiburg where Heidi Forman works at Starbucks. Julie and I both went and had fun exploring the town. It was nice to get away from the "BFA bubble" for a while. It felt nice to make my own choices as well. Living without a cell/car and with a host family takes away a lot of my opportunities to make personal choices and decisions. Things like what/when I eat, how I dress, where I go, and things I do. My last 3-4 years have had varying levels of independence between going back and forth between Cedarville and home and between high school and college. For instance, I am more restricted now in what I can do than I was over the summer, yet I've more entered the "professional" world now by teaching, than I had this summer. Typically, I think independent living and entering the professional world would come hand in hand, and while my time teaching here has taught me a lot, it really hasn't prepared me for teaching in the states - not that I really expected it to. I wanted to teach at BFA for the things it can teach me about the international world, missionary community, and MK students, but I still have much to learn about living on my own, teaching American public school students, and working with secular but professional co-workers. So, I wonder what kind of growing/learning I will have to do yet again when I get my first teaching job. More on this later.

Following my Freiburg day, which consisted of two trips to free Starbucks, shopping, meeting random Germans, and getting lost because I lost the map, I got back to the house, changed, and then went with a friend to a local German "dance." I say that in quotations because it ended up being more of a social than a dance, as many people didn't enter the dance floor, but it was interesting to observe how Germans have parties and to get to know the lady, Anne, I went with a little better. I think we'll be good friends for the rest of my time here. She's a really strong Christian and works with ESL students at BFA, and we both have a shared interest in dance. She studies foreign languages and our conversations have really motivated me to want to learn German when I get back to the states.

Last week on of my students invited me to her dorm, Palmgarten, for Sunday lunch. The dorm has 19 female students, 11 of whom are in my classes. It was fun to see them outside of the school setting and to be able to talk with them more personably. We played a game which I want to find when I get back to the states that was hillarious! It involved lots of charades and random acting and is a perfect party game. It makes you get out of your element - I had to act out different scenarios like "Tell your daughter you just ran over her favorite pet" and "Show the transformation of a werewolf in a full moon" and " Pretend you're a ghost and scare everyone away." I was glad to act goofy in front of my students and one of my student's visiting parents, and it did make me get out of my comfort zone.

Now, I am starting week 6, and can't believe that this week marks the halfway point. The time has literally flown by! This week we finish Hamlet (we read the last part today). The next 3 (and final) weeks of my teaching will be over Renaissance poetry. I'm not looking forward to this section as much because it will be harder to teach and maintain interest, and I am not as prepared.

This past Friday I cooked for the Formans, my favorite recipe, Barry's Noodle Bake. It's a noodle/tomato/ground beef/ sour cream caserole mix and is o-so-good. Yum! Here's a picture of the caserole, and Heidi and I accidentally matching.

A Medley of Events

Several updates for you concerning random, unrelated events. I think this calls for some bullet points:

• Laird Leavit, the principal at BFA, is also my supervisor and does 5 observations of me while I'm here. He replaces the role of my advisor from school who typically, if I were teaching in the states, would come to observe me to evaluate my internship. Laird and I scheduled for him to sit in on my 7th period class yesterday, Friday. I did feel a little nervous in anticipation, remembering how 7th period is my rowdiest, but once the class started, I felt fine and was only vaguely conscious that he was there. I guess he knows something about Hamlet because every once in a while he'd nod his head up and down when I made certain "good" points. I had some technical difficulty getting the projector to work; after trying for about a minute, I realized that I needed to get the kids working on something since the technical solution might take an indefinite amount of time. I assigned them a quick group-work project while I finished fixing the projector and was glad to get it working after another minute or so. I thought the lesson went really well, and at the end we scheduled a time to meet on Monday to discuss it, but he did tell me that he thought it went really well. Laird is a really good teacher himself, and so I'm really glad for his feedback and advice on areas to improve. Also, I'm glad that I felt comfortable teaching in front of him, because it helped to stretch me and gave me practice working under nerves. I feel more confident about my teaching and ability to make quick, on the spot decisions.


• Friday, also, I gave my first pop quiz! I have to admit, I did delight in it a little too much. For one, it's the most authoritative thing I've done so far - giving a quiz - so it made me feel even more like a teacher. Secondly, I had suspicions some of them weren't reading their homework, and I was glad to give them a little wake-up call. As Jill put it, "How many more wake-up calls do they need!" The class has been rather slack all year. Anyway, it did give me flashbacks to Politics and American Culture at CU; we had frequent, yet infrequent, pop quizzes that were enough to keep you anxious until the first 5 minutes of class had passed. So, I did have sympathy for them, but reminded them that the questions did not require analysis or deep thought to be answered correctly. Rather, they would do well if they had read their homework, and would be unable to do well if they hadn't. That's the purpose of a pop quiz. On average, the three classes scored 2.5/5. So, not that well. It took most of their cumulative grades down one point. But, you can be sure, they'll be reading their homework over the weekend.


• One of my students from Palmgarten, a local dorm, invited me to eat a Sunday lunch with her and some my other students at the dorm. The students often invite their teachers to come eat with them, but I felt glad to be asked because it showed me that they like me and are accepting me. Which isn't my goal as a teacher, but it is nice. I do have a strong desire to be friends with some of these girls who are only a few years younger than me, but I'll want to make sure to find the right line. I've had more soccer invites and out-of-school invites which I'm glad to be a part of, but it is a little weird with them being my students. As long as I can maintain authority and control while teaching but still be able to let down when socializing, things should be fine.


• Friday night, all of the classes had class parties at the school (each classes planned and organized their own party, however). Jill is a sophomore class sponsor, so I helped work with her. During a planning meeting, I was telling the class officers and sponsors about how I used to participate in shaving cream wars with my
• youth group. Everyone brought shaving cream and had a free-for-all, trying to "cream" as many of your friends on the playing field as possible. So, we decided to do it, but substituted whipped cream for shaving cream. Friday night came cold and dark and wet, but everyone still had a blast. Surprisingly, I was the only one of all the students and adults who didn't participate. I didn't really mean for it to happen this way, but I ended up making the fire and documenting the whole thing, so I really didn't have time to play. A couple of the sophomore girls I played soccer with still found a way to get some on me however. They "just" wanted a "hug" after all. :)


• I also volunteered to fill a need for the upcoming school play. They sent out an e-mail requesting help during the dress rehearsal and performances to do hair updos/curling/etc. I like to do this kind of stuff and thought it'd be fun to get to see what a h.s. play was like behind the scenes. I'm looking forward to it, and to getting to know some of the cast better (some of them are my students).

And now for a weekend. Nice to sleep in. I've been here a month now! Time has flown by; it'll be hard to leave. I'm really growing to love the school and community here. It's unlike anything I'll experience when teaching in the states, I believe.

It's getting routine

Ah...I do love routine. Remember how I had so little spare time at the beginning of my stay here and thought it'd only get worse once I started teaching full-time? Well, thankfully, things have only gotten better. My daily routine is pretty established and I'm getting everything done and then some! The lessons have gone better each day I've taught; I feel it's been weeks that I've taught now instead of only 4 days. I look forward to this weekend, but don't have a ton of things to catch up on. Praise God!

First period is starting to come around; they are more actively participating in discussion and seeming to enjoy class more. I've also been able to tweek my lessons more each day so that I have a balance of reading/discussion/DVD that I think works well to encourage learning while maintaining interest.

Second period is as lovely as ever. Wednesday I showed a short clip from youtube of one of Hitler's arousing speeches. I used this to help the students connect with their vocabulary word, demagogue. I couldn't easily get it to project on the overhead (for some reason) during 2nd period, so, being a smaller class, I just had them huddle around my laptop and watch it. This little event seemed to break the walls down even more and made my relationship with the students more comfortable. They crowded in, laughingly pushing and shoving, commenting on the video, interpreting the German for me, and guessing at what demagogue could mean. It was a good experience; I never would have thought I'd be glad for technological mishaps, but I was on Wednesday.

Seventh period is still deciding on me, but I've had a little bit more of a break through. One girl in particular seems to have a slight chip on her shoulder and isn't as friendly and affable as the rest. She's been talking to her classmates a lot during class, and I been trying to decide the appropriate way to handle it. Calling her out on it, especially during class, might only set her off; I feel as if she's the type that once your on her bad side, you stay there. So, I wanted to handle the situation carefully. God provided a way. At the end of 7th period on Wednesday, they announced over the intercom that Thursday after school would be a girls-only soccer game for anyone who wanted to participate. I happily exclaimed how fun that'd be, and how I'd like to play. Several girls in the class excitedly told me to join, and to my surprise, the one girl extended a personal invitation after everyone else had left. The next day, today, I had several girls from different periods ask me if I was playing, and then the girl from 7th made a specific point again to ask me. I was really glad for this, and thought that we could possibly build some mutual respect on the soccer field (haha, I feel like a guy saying that).

So, after school today I changed into my sports clothes (and underarmor...it was about 50 degrees out with a wind) and headed toward the field. It was a blast to play. We played half-field, 5 v. 5. I took turns playing goalie and forward and scored 3 goals. yay! There ended up being 3 girls from my English classes and we had fun all playing together. I felt weird having them call my Miss Kindt on the field, so I told them to call me Laura...hope that was ok. :) I laughed and joked with them as my peers, so now I'm curious to teach them in class tomorrow as their teacher. Overall, however, it was a great time, to be out in the brisk air, running, dripping snot, and coughing (I don't think this exercise helped my lingering cough at all). But it was worth it! At the end we took a smiling, then serious, then goofy picture. Here's the goofy one.

German phrase of the day: Where is the bathroom? = Wo ist die Toillete?

Also, I've had dinner leftovers for the past three days and it's been GREAT! And...we're having starbucks coffee with dessert tonight. Mmmmm. I've missed that. Heidi works at a Starbucks in Freiburg.

Uh...Miss Kindt? *Raised hand*

When I get asked this question, I know I'm a real teacher. It feels great to have the students calling me "Miss Kindt" and asking me questions. I don't let on that I feel more like their peer than adult. I'll keep pretending I know what I'm doing. :)

The first two days have been pretty great! Things have gone fairly smoothly, I've felt prepared and confident about my material, and I'm enjoying myself. I already have my favorite periods; here's a description.

Period 1: My least favorite. It is the first class of the day, and you can tell. There are 20 students, they are tired, and don't feel like participating in engaging, literary discussion. This class will be my biggest challenge. I'm still working on some way to get them more interested. What I do in 2nd and 7th period, won't work for them. Also, this is my first time teaching the material, so I'm a little more rusty with them. After I learn from my mistakes in first period, I correct them in the other two; so, they're my guinea pigs, unfortunately.

Period 2: My favorite. It's the smallest at 15 students, and there is good classroom chemistry. I have a couple of popular jokesters who work with me (I would hate to have them work against me) and a couple of thinkers who produce some good discussion. I feel that I can let down more with this class, and don't have to come across quite as teacherish. The atmosphere is definitely more relaxed. The other two classes have 20 students each. It's really amazing the difference 5 students can make.

Period 7: My rowdy group. Yes, it's the last period of the day, and they know it, and I know it, and we all know it. This group can get pretty crazy and hard to shush. This class also has the biggest group of students who like to push the edge, except that they aren't quite working with me yet. I hope to win them over after a few more days. The class has a lot of potential because enthusiasm is better than apathy, but I need to find a way to direct it.

Overall, I need to work on being a better discussion leader. I don't feel I'm quite able to connect the literature to the student's lives. Partly, I'm still adjusting to teaching and not confident/relaxed enough yet to reach them personally. Partly too, they are still testing me out, observing me, deciding whether to trust me or not.

I'm patiently waiting through these first few days; I think the outcome will be good. It doesn't necessarily help that most of my 12th grade students are not huge enthusists of "archaic" Hamlet. :)

Outside of school, I'm doing quite well. Things are getting a little chilly here; normally I'm in short sleeves by the afternoon, but today stayed pretty chilly. Julie and I intend on exploring the local countryside this Saturday. I hope it's a beautiful fall day! I'll probably not take my camera; she already knows I'm an avid photo-taker, and if I bring my camera, we'll have to keep stopping for that "perfect picture" because "the sun is just right," "that plant is in perfect bloom," and "look at the way the wind toys with tree." Like you can even see the wind in a picture.

Anyway, the reason I mention the weather is because it's quite chilly in the house. The Formans don't have centralized heating. I have a radiator, but it's "not time to turn that on yet," so I'm spending most evenings snuggling under blankets, drinking hot drinks, and curling up with my books. Ok...what's wrong with that? Today I talked to Jan about my lunches. This is lunch #17 of a ham and swiss sandwich. I'm not a huge fan of cold cuts, and ham and swiss is my least favorite. I asked her if I could take cut, raw vegetables to school with me. She, of course, was really obliging and said, "sure, whatever you want, let me know, and I'll get it for you." I didn't want to bother her by saying anything earlier (don't we all hate feeling like an imposition?), but I'm learning I need to ask for what I want, or else it doesn't help anyone. I also miss cooking (and American food) and appreciate how much work she puts into the dinners she makes, so I asked if I could cook one night a week. So now, I'm cooking Friday nights. I think my first dish will be Barry's noodle bake (my favorite casserole from back home...Mom, could you e-mail me the recipe? :) I'll try to take a picture for you!

Mmmm...pizza

I'm feeling much better; almost back to normal! Thanks for the prayers, there has been no secondary infection, and I only have a lingering cough...but you know how those like to stick around. Apparently, I got this flu from the daughters, Heidi and Maria, who came down with a milder case of it while vacationing in England. Alec Forman has just picked up the milder form too (why am I the only one who got it severly? lol). He explained to me, "Don't worry about passing it to me, the girl's passed it to you, and we like to share in our family." He seems to always surprise me with quick puns. He's more quiet around the 3 talkative women, but just when you least expect it, he'll let out a zinger. Today, Jan, Alec, and I were sitting in the living room each working on separate things. Jan was laughing about how she went to the bedroom to do something which she quickly forgot upon arriving there. After explaining that older people have these "forgetful moments" more often than younger, Alec turned to look at me and said, "Hey you, what's your name again?" It was perfect. Alec was recently diagnosed with Alzheimer's, so it's good to hear him make jokes like this. He seems as sharp as anyone to me, but I guess it's just in the early stages. The Forman's are very loving and supportive of each other, each in their own styles; I'm grateful for the support base he'll have as the disease progresses.

Yesterday Jill and I hosted a little literary fans "movie and pizza night." Jill thought of the idea sometime earlier this week when we were sitting in the classroom, avoiding eye contact with an ominous pile of papers-to-be-graded. We watched a BBC, 4-hour film based off a Victorian novel called North and South. It was basically the A&E Pride and Prejudice with a social conscious. The movie's plot was about a romance as well as the beginnings of the unions in the textile industry in Victorian England. Good movie! Jill and I both made pizza (my signature chicken/alfredo and her own sausage/tomato). Both were delicious and the other women we invited (all new teachers around my age or a little older) all brought different sides and drinks. Here's a picture of some of us.

Tomorrow is my first day teaching full-time! I'm pretty nervous about it. For one, the seniors all just got back from Rome and will be hard to get into the school mindset. I'm trying to think of a good segue, but so far nothing is coming to mind. After church today a group of my students stopped me and asked whether I was going to start teaching them this Monday. We talked for about 5 minutes, and it was good to connect with them on a personal level like that. After one or two days into the classroom, things will start being really enjoyable and relaxing; I just need to get there! :)

In close, here's a picture I took while walking to Jill's apartment. I'm still amazed by the beauty of this place. We've had a few rainy days lately, and on my 8 a.m. walk to school I saw the most beautiful scene as the mist and fog was slipping in and out of the heavily-wooded forests that surround Kandern like a keep. Really, pictures can't even capture the experience and scenery. Sorry! ;)

Wrong Thing Right Time

I apologize for the length of time that has passed from this post to the last. Last Sunday morning I woke up with “allergies,” and proceeded to feel worse as the day progressed. I soon realized that my “allergies” was actually the flu. By the end of the day, I was in bed, barely able to get up. Thankfully, I was able to easily skip school on Monday and slept through most of the day. By Tuesday I was feeling pretty badly still, but able to go to school, and by Wednesday was still feeling pretty uncomfortable, but got some good work done. Now, Thursday, I am still battling symptoms but feel closer to par than I have for a while. While I would have loved to avoid this whole thing, it really did come at the right time, and I thank God for that. Because the students were gone on senior trip, I had no classes to teach. So, when I was at school, I worked quietly at my computer without the pressure of standing in front of a group of students and trying to think and act coherently with 20 pairs of eyes watching. Rather, I could do all my sneezing, nose blowing, coughing, and moaning in relative privacy, and was able to come home each day to sleep and relax. :) I still feel pretty congested in my head, so please pray against a secondary infection in my sinuses or ears. That would be a hastle!

So, as I said, this week has been pretty laid back. Mr. Forman’s Aunt and Uncle are visiting (originally English, but live in Australia). His Uncle is only 8 years older than him. On Sunday we all went to a local vacation town bordering the Alps for tea and cake at this cute hotel. I thought I could handle the trip, but realized about 15 minutes in that it was not a good idea, as Uncle Jeff said, “Well, you’re deteriorating quickly!” What I saw of the scenery was lovely, however! The town itself has several Roman baths built over the originals. Jan said we would go sometime soon. They are essentially the same as the original Roman baths: heated pools to varying degrees which you move between. It’s supposed to be for healing and therapy purposes, but people just go for fun too (to those who read Jane Austen, these are the same type of baths her characters visit in the Bath, England). I also learned about a new, easily-accessible, hiking trail on our drive home. I hope to explore it as soon as I’m feeling better. I learned that most of the isolated pockets of towns within a 30 to 60 mile radius are connected by hiking trails and wooded pathways. The scenery in between towns as well as the quaintness of the towns is incredible. The weather here is still unusually lovely – I hope it stays that way!

Well, the Hamlet unit is almost here! I just finished my required 5 long-form lesson plans (these are the “training” lesson plan forms that no one uses in real life and all teachers-in-training hate. They take quite a while to write because of the detail required. This internship requires the first 5 be this way, then I can continue with short form, or “block,” planning for the remaining time. YES!). I feel like a nerd, but I just checked out two books from the library on contemporary literary criticisms of Hamlet (one by Harold Bloom) and am so excited to begin reading them. Jill and I also mapped out what I’ll be teaching for the rest of the semester. It’s was weird to be talking about when Jill will starting taking the classes back again around Dec 1. I realized that though I have a lot ahead, the end is not that far off. Wow!

Wie ghet's Ihnin?

Today I decided that I have not had as much cultural experience as I would like. It is very easy to get swept up in the BFA/North American community here and ignore the German community altogether. It's one of the reasons that many of the missionaries who work at the school or with Janz Team can have lived here for 8+ years and know very little German (also most Kandern Germans only speak a dialect of German found here in the southern part of the country). I have two reasons to stay enclosed in the North American community: 1) I don't have much time to take jaunters around town or to visit nearby places. 2) It is more comfortable for me to not venture out. I didn't realize how intimidating it can be to face a culture I cannot communicate with by myself. I didn't have this experience the last time I was here, but I was with a bunch of CU friends then. It is different to take it all on, seemingly alone. Part of my plan to "encounter more German culture" begins with learning more of their language. I've decided to learn one phrase a day. I know that with my time and duration here, I won't be able to learn the language, so I'd rather learn phrases and expressions for conversational German. My phrase today is "How are you?" thus "Wie ghet's Ihnin?" or just "Wie ghet's?"

This morning I took my Harry Potter book 2, a camera, chapstick, and my keys on a walk. We went a route I had done earlier with Maria to Riedlingen. The day was pleasant with a sunny, blue sky and 65 degree weather. The path is most beautiful, about a 20 minute walk both in covered woods and public areas, and I was glad to stop as I liked to take scenic pictures (until my battery died). I stopped at a now favorite spot to read a few chapters and then turned around to head back. My "ground beef" story of today was my path through the golf course. Part of the walking path merges for about 1/4 mile with a golf course path. Being a beautiful day and a German holiday, there were many golfers out and about. Previously, Julie and I had been on another part of the course and had been shooed away with a sharp reprimand for jogging on golfing property. As I wandered off today, I was shooed again. I now realize that this 1/4 mile strip is the only one that non-golfers are allowed to be on.

Once I had that down, on my returning walk, I thought I wouldn't have any more run-ins. Let me digress for a minute: I've been given the impression that Germans are rather curt and direct. My interactions with them thus far have been devoid of pleasant vocal tones, kind smiles, and a desire to understand and be understood. I smile now to think of it, however, because I believe that I provoke most of the curt attitudes I receive. It has been the case several times thus far that when I pass a German who wishes to talk with me, I don't realize they are talking to me (obviously, I don't know what they're saying). It is only at the raised-voice, intentional-tone point that I stop to turn around and see that they were talking to me all along (otherwise, I just think they are talking with whomever they are walking). So, it is no wonder that when I actually give them my "time of day," they are a little perturbed that I seemed to initially ignore them and that I won't even speak their language. Back to today. So I began to enter the 1/4 mile strip again, casually passing some golfers, when they began to talk to me, which I realized the third sentence through. I got the impression that they wanted me to stop as someone was about to tee-off and I would be in the way. I politely waited and began to walk again with the "waiting crowd" up the path. About 30 feet later, the crowd I was with stopped (obviously to tee-off again), but I kept walking because the path went to the side of where they were aiming. However, I again heard a "halt," and turned around to see what was up. The two ladies started speaking in German, but switched to very good English when I told them I didn't speak German. The one was very short and told me to wait till she was done, the other made a partial joke about what type of ball they were using and how much it would hurt if it were to hit me. I appreciated her kind affectation, but gave a covered scowl to the other one. At this rate, I thought I'd never get through the strip. Finally, after both had finished their swings, I quickly walked on, hoping to just get through and stop offending/bothering people and myself. I was grateful when the paths separated again, and I could just enjoy the nature by myself. For a while I was affected by the situation, frustrated that I given an unintentional rude impression to them because of my ignorance. But then I realized that it really wasn't my fault, I hadn't intended to be rude, and laughed to myself. At least I know proper German golfing etiquette now (I wonder if this is American golfing etiquette also? I wouldn't know).

Looking back on the week...

Wednesday and Thursday went smoothly. The senior class left for their week-long trip to Rome on Thursday night. I was surprised by myself at the end of 7th period. When the final school bell rang, all the seniors excitedly got up and began talking and running for the door. The way they were so excited to leave school and move on to something new reminded me of what senior year graduations are like. Especially at a boarding school or college, this time is difficult because everyone knows they won't ever see most of their classmates again. While this wasn't the-last-schoolday-of-the-year day, the excitement and anticipation felt the same. For a few seconds, I got a wave of sadness to see them go. I have only known them for two weeks, and really haven't even begun to develop relationships with them, and yet the parting was bittersweet. I thought to how hard it must be to see your seniors leave when you are the full-time teacher and have known many of the students and their siblings/parents for many years (as in Jill's case). It's the same feeling you get when a sports season ends and you say goodbye to the team, or when any significant phase of your life ends. Yes, you're excited about what's coming next, but you realize too that you'll never be in that place with those people with these feelings again. My few seconds of sorrow and nostalgia were insignificant really, but it did make me think more about transitions, attachments, and opportunities.

Friday was concentration camp field day for the 10th graders. We traveled about 1.5 hours away from Kandern into France. This concentration camp, Natzweiler-Struthof, was the only one located in France and was a labor camp, not a death camp. It's relatively small compared to most and was used mainly to house French and German resistance, though there were some Jews/Poles/Gypsies, etc. This is the first time I'd been to an actual concentration camp. I was unsure as to how it would affect me since I have read a lot about the Holocaust, been to several memorials/museums, and am familiar with what went on. The visit was more sobering than I expected. It's hard to describe, I will partially try, but it's more like you have to be there, to see and know for yourself. Basically, I realized that I was standing on the ground and in the buildings where some of the cruelest and most heinous acts were committed. I heard about the specific scientific experiments that were performed and saw the instruments and "furniture" used to commit them. I viewed the crematorium and the ash pit used to "make room" for more. I saw the rooms and heard vividly described the scenarios where people were lined up and shot. I saw the hangman's noose and learned of the sadistic mental games the SS played on those intermed there. Probably the most startling part of the trip was when we visited the gas chamber. An anatomical "doctor" studying nearby wanted specimens to study, hoping to find a genetic difference between races that would prove an inferior and superior race. He "ordered" Gypsies and Jews from Natzweiler who were gassed and then "stored" in vats, which we saw, to be shipped to the doctor. Being there, seeing the pictures, hearing the stories, and knowing that all this happened but 50 years ago made me (and the 10th graders) really pause to reflect on and consider what man is capable of. It is of course not pleasant to see, and there were times I wanted to plug my ears and not know, but I knew I needed to know. History affects the future, for those who care to look. It is imporant to know what man has done and is capable of, lest later generation think they are any better and will do things any differently.

Another interesting part of this trip was hearing about the war from the German perspective. Allow me this disclaimer: what I am about to discuss has nothing to do with who was right and who was wrong or where blame should be placed. It is simply an observation on the commonality of humanity.

Several of the chaperones had fathers and aunts and uncles who were in the war, serving (often by force) as Nazis or in the SS. These chaperones talked about their German relatives in the war. They told how few veterans talked about what happened as many were forced to do what they did, and experienced, though in a different way, severe emotional scarring also. More than the German economy and politics was left in ruins after the war. I left with unanswerable questions and thoughts about how all of this came about. Previously I had only ever thought about the Jewish perspective or the American perspective, but now I also realize that many Germans were suffering, confused, and hopeless as well. I left with a new perspective, thinking less about the importance of sides, and who did what, but rather about the sorrows of all mankind and the corruption of power. I'm not at all trying to say that what was done in the concentration camps was somehow less grievous because of the cost the German people suffered. I simply added another perspective to what I already knew: to separate the country from the individual. On both sides, the sense of loss and the question of "why?" haunted those who survived the war.

This week gave me both funny and sobering exeriences. I was glad for both. The weekend holds much lesson planning and study. I want to know Hamlet backwards and forwards before I begin teaching it full time a week from now.

Also, I went to McDonalds!!